ThisClose

*sigh*

First of all, I have bad news for everyone. Denard Span has a girlfriend... I think. If he does, and if it's the girl I'm finding online, her name is Shadonna and you can find her here. I don't even really know what to say about this. All I can really say is that I will likely spend several hours in a dark room crying. 

Meanwhile, the Twins are thisclose to owning the American League Central Division. It could happen as early as tonight. The good news is that there is quite literally no chance that the Twins won't take the AL Central. The bad news is that Joe Mauer is day-to-day with a knee injury. Mauer jammed his left knee and is getting an MRI. Gardenhire says it's probably nothing serious, but I don't think the timing could possibly be worse. However, keep in mind that last year, when Joe started the season on the disabled list, he came back with a vengeance and hit like 4 home runs every at bat. 

What the Hell?

Now is the time where I have to take back something I said in an earlier post. My sincerest apologies to Danny Valencia. I mislabeled you. Well, maybe I just changed my mind, because I pretty much think you're all-star material now. Where have you been all my life? If you can continue to hit the way you've been hitting lately, I think I see a future secret marriage for us. I mean that, Danny - with all of my heart. And now that Denard may not be an option for me, things are looking great for you and I. 


Look how far you've come!

Back in the Rock Cats days

In the Bigs

But also, let's talk about your on-field etiquette... I appreciate that your hand is in the same place I would like my hand to be, but you don't really need to announce that to the entire stadium, Danny. It can be our secret.

Touchy-Feely

Moving on... since it's apparent that the Twins will win their division, the next piece of excitement will come from figuring out who will get home-field advantage. Major League Baseball rules state that 2 teams from the same division cannot play each other in the first round of playoffs, therefore, no matter their records, the Twins will face either the Yankees or the Rays. 

The standings right this second:

The Twins have the second best record in the American League. If the playoffs began today, the Yankees would have home-field advantage. The only way to right this wrong is for the Twins to continue kicking ass for the remaining 12 games and show the American League East that there's a new sheriff in town. His name is Danny Valencia.